Hi there unofficial openers! Here's a bit of controversy for you! The day after I finished my run at The Edinburgh Fringe Festival 2011 I continued my Scottish Iliad in a Northerly vector as I travelled up to the ancient and historic town of Stonehaven on the Caledonian North East coast to compere a gig that featured Gary Delaney, Wayne The Weird and the quite ridiculous Trevor Lock. As I drove into the town I was welcomed with the following sign
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| Home of the pneumatic tyre? Hmm... |
Well! I had no idea! As I continued into the town I also saw THIS!
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| ...Makes sense now! |
Famous for
two things? The spare tyre
and the deep fried mars bar - I can't help thinking the two are connected...
With no time to track down the birthplace of R.W. Thomson and possessing a particularly itchy scissor finger, I decided I simply
had to unofficially open The Carron Fish Bar! But Oh woe! When I approached them I was DOWN RIGHT FLAT REFUSED to go anywhere near the place, ribbon fans. I asked for the manager who was busy upstairs and wouldn't even listen to my enquiry. I pondered this - why wouldn't they want a bit of free publicity? what could they possibly be hiding? They couldn't stop me taking a photo of myself though, looking thoroughly glum and bewildered...
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| As luck would have it, I managed to get the photo without the "M" for "Mars". Quite fitting, with hindsight. |
...I don't give up that easily though and with the ribbon already cut I was going to have to unofficially open
something and hit upon the idea of going down to the harbour. Parked up and with my mood already lifting I hit a double jackpot - not only is the little bay beautiful and steeped in history...
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| Stonehaven Harbour - an unlikely place for a meeting of minds but hey - that's Unofficial Opening for you! |
...It was also being visited by a certain Ben and Heather. She set up the "UK Skeptics" group in Aberdeen and he had a very interesting angle on conspiracy theory. I told them of my deep-fried mars bar-related plight and without batting a skeptical eyelid he deduced that "Maybe The Carron Fish Bar is NOT
really the birthplace of the deep fried mars bar". OF COURSE! They're living a lie, scissor people, THEY'RE LIVING A LIE. Anyway, all things considered, it seemed only right that they helped restore balance to the cosmos and thank goodness they did because their inspiration led me (later in the day) to perhaps my most esoteric opening yet. For now, though - let's consider Stonehaven Harbour officially...
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| Ben and Heather - ribbon holders of fine repute and cunning deduction |
...OPEN! Come back soon for some more unofficial opening - and spread the word - That way, you never know, I could be in
your town soon, cheekily sorting out a little bit of UNOFFICIAL OPENING!
Very odd. A good friend of mine lives there. He runs a pub too... probably good i didn't tell you that before you went.
ReplyDeleteShame actually - I spent most of my time after the gig in The Royal Hotel. I could easily have got to where he was. It's a wicked little town actually - Have you ever been?
ReplyDeleteYey! We had a great time unofficially opening Stonehaven Harbour! Just a note, I didn't set up the skeptics in the Pub, I just set up the one in Aberdeen, more info for anyone that is interested in having fun in a pub here - http://skeptic.org.uk/events/skeptics-in-the-pub
ReplyDeleteExcellent work, Hapsci - and what a happy accident bumping into you in the harbour - difficult to be skeptical about THAT!
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