Opening N N N N Nineteen and it's N N N N National!

Och Aye The Noo Unofficial Openers! My journey home from Scotland took a lot longer than I was expecting because I kept stopping at places with silly names for fun and games and obviously for some potential openings. Sadly, most of the places weren't as much fun as their names suggested and by the time I got to the border my scissor fingers were fair old itching to snip some ribbon in almost any circumstances.

The bizarrely named Crook Of Devon. I could find no information about this little place, what it's doing in Scotland I don't know and sadly there was no-one about. Hence my look of disgust -  I can't very well unofficially open something by myself, can I?

But what was I to do? I stopped off at the viewing point where our two nations collide because I had espied a burger van and, well, if I couldn't get an unofficial opening in before I left Caledonia, I was at least going to have a cheeseburger!

As I got out of the car I saw a group of lads clowning around by the border stone and offered to take a photo of all of them. They were made up that they could all get in the picture (They had been arguing about who would take the shot of the rest of them doing the clowning) and then - POW - it hit me! This was an opportunity that I was unlikely to get again. I got a cold sweat, I shook with trepidation and as they stared at me in disbelief I cried out "You could be ribbon holders! You could take the photo! It's opening time!"

Look at the genuine joy on the faces of these rapscallions! It's not every day you get to unofficially open an entire country!

Seconds later, there I was, scissors in hand, the ribbon was cut and I declared England unofficially... OPEN!

There wasn't a Roman in sight, I didn't hear a single Northumbrian pipe and I had failed to arrange for The Proclaimers and Lindisfarne to affect a Mexican stand off, but it was still emotional. Shortly after this the batteries on my camera died which was a shame - because I'd had another brilliant idea to unofficially close  Scotland on the way out. Never mind - they took the photo themselves! sadly, I'm still waiting for it but should it show up ever, I'll be sure to add it to this blog. Check back soon for more unofficial opening, ribbon fiends!