Unofficially opening a foreign muppet theatre!

Having already opened Zagreb airport I really had the unofficial opening bit between my teeth as I travelled around Croatia last week but it took until Varasdin before I had my scissors and ribbon with me and the stars fell sufficiently into alignment for a cheeky little ad hoc opening just after I had performed on stage in this most beautiful of theatres

Me getting stuck in to 300 foreigners - just the way I like it

I dragged my driver, Filip round to the front doors (I know - I had a driver! This opening verged on official) and procured a couple of hot chicks who were eating ice creams. Well I'd already had the rock going on in Blackpool - so why not? I like a bit of confectionary symmetry. One of them was a little reluctant but when she saw my ribbon she fair old grabbed it. Carpe et diem, Croatian lady! Carpe et diem!

You're right - we had quite a few people hanging around watching this one and some of them even applauded when the ribbon was cut!

Sorry the photograph isn't better, but I'm afraid Filip (Although a very good driver) is a very bad photographer. The first shot he took failed to get any of us in the picture at all so this is actually something of a miracle. David Bailey would not be impressed. It's a good job he wasn't there. Neither was Goran Ivanisevic, more's the pity. I've always liked him.

Opening 8 - Overseas opening! (1)

I know, I know - you could have been mistaken in thinking that "Unofficial Openings" had closed but no! We've just been on hiatus as I've been through a phase of forgetting to take my ribbon out with me on excursions. Last week I remembered, however, and despite a minor logistical hitch (I had to put my scissors in my guitar case as they wouldn't let them on the plane in hand luggage, thus preventing any ad hoc openings on the way through the departure lounge) I got this little beauty on arrival at Zagreb airport which has now been unofficially..... OPENED!

Today's openers were my travelling companions (and fellow comedians), Nick Wilty and Sully O'Sullivan, both of whom needed little convincing that this was a good idea. The two women in the background are simply a little piece of eye candy...

Sadly, Slaven Bilic, Stiliyan Petrov and Robert Prosinecki  were unable to attend as they all had prior commitments, I imagine. This was our first hit-and-run opening as our driver Filip had to leave his car in an extremely dangerous place and run over to take the shot for me as I didn't fancy my chances of explaining to any Croatians what I was attempting to do. This is something I will have to take into consideration for later foreign trips.